04 February 2008

Add another to the "what the fuck did I see in him?" column...

Pickle called at 11:15 tonight; her voice told me she was frightened.

"What's up?"
"Can I come over?"
"Yes, you can always come over. Are you alright?"
"I had to drop A off (the boyfriend) and it started snowing and I can't see anything and I'm really scared."

She was a mile away at the exit for my town, waiting to see if I'd let her come over or if she had to drive the rest of the 25 miles back to her dad's. She asked me to call her dad to let him know what was up and she'd call him when she'd get here. (They were taught not to talk on the phone without a headset, and not at all in bad weather.)

I call him. He proceeds to ask me if she was even here over the weekend. What a fucknut. He's possessed with this idea that she's at A's house when she should be here, fucking her little brains out. Well, Einstein, YOU'RE the one who forced her to get on birth control when she didn't want to because she was 16. Just because she's protected doesn't mean she's going to do it, and vice versa. Anyhow, I said yes she was here after work on Saturday until Sunday afternoon when she went to the Super-Bowl party AT HER GRANDMOTHER'S. (His mother's.)

For God's sake... she's a 4.0 National Honor Society working teenager with a fascination for all music and involved in several clubs. She's a pleasant child whom everyone likes, and you are constantly riding her ass over drug-induced imagined transgressions.

Anyhow... point being, she lives in a box. She was taught to drive, but not allowed to drive in snow. Ok. The first year, yes. But this is year two, and she is scared to death, and tired from fighting the snow for the last hour. She does the right thing. She gets off the road to a safe place, thus saving her life and possibly others'. So you yell at her and tell her now's the time to learn? Are you fucking stupid? It's 11:30 at night, snow/freezing rain, she drives a geo metro (no weight, no traction) and you want her to drive down 2 lane roads that have yet to be salted or plowed because you don't want her here on a night that's not "mine."

She gets to my house and calls to let him know she's here, and what's happening. He's yelling at her that she's spending the night here with A, and other inane ramblings. I'm beyond pissed.

By the time she gets off the phone, she's a wreck, with tears and sniffles. Her grandmother calls to make sure she's alright, and they come to get her and her car. (Grandpa drives the geo, and she's in the truck with grandma.) I had offered to take her home, but she would have been stranded without a car until Monday night after I got off work.

The grandparents get here, and tell her it was pretty bad out coming in to town. It was more sleet than snow at this point. Thank God at least she has someone to tell her father that the weather over here was bad. He's convinced that I'm conniving with her against him. Grow up, shithead. She's making good, sound decisions and you're making her second-guess herself all the time. She's strong as I was; she'll overcome you. Right now, she's exhausted and just doesn't understand why when she did the right thing, she gets in trouble.

Because your father is a dick. I'm sorry I didn't tell you this before, Pickle. I apologize that you must suffer at the hands of a complete moron because he is a total control freak and he despises that you are me. 20 years younger. It's not you. You are a beautiful girl, with a beautiful mind, and a warm smile to match your huge heart. You will be free one day and I will miss you when you go, but I know you'll come visit me.

She asked me why he couldn't be more like grandpa. *sigh* He was at one time, and things got in the way after he got out of school. Grandpa doesn't smoke dope and drink excessively. Your father's paranoid, and lazy, and will never be more than he is today. I tried to get you, so much so that after years, the judge told me to knock it off because he couldn't see moving you from the home when you were so well-adjusted and doing well in school. Well, sure. When you live in a box and school is your only escape, yea. That doesn't teach you to be a socially adept person. Luckily, outside influences have helped.

Argh. Add another one to my "I wouldn't wish him dead, but if he fell off the face of the earth I would not be sad" list...


Wien. said...

Poor Pickle. I feel for her and hate, HATE, HATE people who are supposed to be parents who use their children as pawns. I have one, you have one, other blog friends have them too. I think it would be nice to put them all on the same ship and show them the edge of the earth.

George said...

My eldest gave me a nice plaque to hang on the wall a few years ago on father's day. I am very proud of it. It reads ... anybody man can be a father but it takes someone special to be a dad.

Sounds like Pickle only has a father ... nothing more than a sperm donor.

Miss B said...

one can only leave it up to karma... what goes around truly comes around. i've seen it this year many times...

he is a sperm donor. he didn't want her because he wanted to raise her; he wanted her because he did not want me to have her. it's always a control thing with him. he's going to learn a painful lesson about losing something because you hold on too tightly.

and I will get to see my future grandchildren frequently. *grin*