"Yea." I'm so pleasant when I'm foul and pissy.
"I'm sorry." beat "Are you still mad at me?"
"I no longer care."
I knew it wasn't over.
She tells him she was drinking at home with me. OMFG. *breathe*
She and I go back inside as he and the Sherriff explain to her DD that he needs to leave the city limits and not come back there tonight. (He lives in the next town over.) He takes off, cell phones are ringing, they're making plans.
She tries to talk her sister into driving her out to meet him because they're supposed to take off for the concert in the morning. I put my foot down. She's still young enough to be tagged with a curfew violation. It's 5a (I have to be up for work in 50 minutes) and she thinks she's going to walk to the other side of town (about 2.5 mi).
I ask her who was bartending tonight; she tells me she doesn't know. Fine. I get my keys, get her the hell out of there before she wakes the building again, and take her to meet him. Don't look at me like that. We have a bad history. I'm pissed off enough tonight that it would get ugly. And if she's gonna yak all over the place, let it be HIS family's place.
The ride was not pleasant. She says to me words that haunt me today. "Drinking takes me to my happy place."
Her father was a coke addict and a drinker. I never did one, and rarely do the other. She gets the proclivity from him. I have counseled, educated, and gotten professional help for her for the last 3 years. She has the knowledge; it's out of my hands now whether she uses it. I remind her of her father's issues and she's upset because I tell her she's embarrassed the family. This is what she tells me she's upset about on the phone today.
I pull up next to the DD, get out and open his passenger door. While she's coming around, I ask him who was bartending tonight. He says he was. By now she's in the car. I look at him, look at her and say, "Oh, so you don't know who was bartending, huh?" She get the "caught" look and sinks down - the depressive side of the alcohol has now caught up with her - and I slam the door and take off without another word. I get home in time for a 35 minute nap and stumble into work. It is not a good day.
FF to the phone conversation this evening. She's only doing it because she's bored; she doesn't have school to keep her occupied 'til fall, and it's no big deal, she didn't mean to hurt me, she's sorry, blah blah blah....
"Mom, you still there?"
"Yep, just flashing back 19 years ago." That hurt. She goes off. She's not her father, blah blah blah. He used to lie, cheat, steal and I remind her that she and her DD BOTH looked me in the eye and lied to me. I hate being lied to with a passion that is beyond explanation. And she gets that same look that passes over her face right before she does it - she can't control it and it pisses her off. I tell her I'm done with it. In a few short days, she's responsible for herself and I can only offer guidance. If she chooses not to accept it, she will pay the consequences.
Don't look at me like that. I've always made her own up to what she's done, take responsibility for her actions when she's had to go to court. She's worked and paid all her fines, and done her community service. And Lord knows I've done MY time with her.
She tells me she'll call me tomorrow. I care. I tell her "fine" and hang up.
This does not amuse me. She is being a horrible example for her younger sister, who thinks the world of her. I'm pissed because there is seemingly nothing that gets through to this girl that she has a great future if she would just