My Daughter has a Big Heart...

and it drives me CRAZY!!!

Always thinking of others, most times to the exclusion of herself and her immediate family. She is constantly wanting to have people stay here who are having trouble. Some work out great (Joel - my little Marine buddy who has really turned himself around) and some not so great. (Nicky - who brought drugs into my home, ran off with the carnival people, and wants to come back.)

I get this phone call from my daughter while I'm on my way home:
"Mom, the car's been in an accident." Yea, I caught that too.
"Where were you? Did the car wreck by itself?"
"No. I was on my way to work." K, not makin' much sense here.
"Were you not driving?"
"No." AAARRRGGGHHH FRICKEN RULE #1
"What???" Swerving to miss semi and various other cars.
"Mom, I need you to calm down."
"Who was driving MY car which ONLY has liability on it and NO ONE else's name on it?" Blood Pressure WAAAYYY up now, envisioning lawsuits.
"Jen." Her best friend Jen (cute, perky, opinionated) was having something done to her car. (A stereo system put in, I came to find out.) Jen also has a lousy driving record (3 tickets, already lost it once - not a good candidate for using someone else's vehicle. As a CDL holder, I guard my license with my life.)

"What the F*#& was she doing driving MY car? Do you realize I'm liable for whatever happens?"

"No mom, Jen's parents already said they'd pay for everything."
At this point, I move onto a large tirade about liabiity, insurance rules and the fact that since she's not covered under my insurance, it will automatically be my car's fault because it should never have been at that spot at that time. She gets pissed and HANGS UP ON ME.

Oh HEEELLLL no... you do NOT call me, tell me you did something so STUPID and HANG UP on me when I get pissed off about it. I call her back, reminding her that IIIII pay for that cell phone and I'll break the Mother F*)#)# myself if she hangs up on me again.

I find out where they are, and tell her I'll be there within 10 minutes. I make it there and by then Jen and the other kid from the other vehicle (which had to be towed, OF COURSE) have already been taken to the hospital by ambulance. Fricken great.

As I walk up to the investigating officer, my daughter's yappin' a mile a minute about how Jen knows its her fault and she's gonna pay for it. I look at her and tell her to "stop, now". (She is still innocent and naive enough to think that the world will be ok and everyone is good and kind and fair. Pardon me while I roll on the floor and laugh my ass off for a minute.)

The officer just looks at me - we've been through her stupidity before. He's one of the cops we know by first name because they've been to our place so many times and I've been up to the cop shop so frequently picking her dumb ass up. I thought she'd finally come around. He just smiles, "yes it's still illegal to kill her." Ha Ha. Just give me the facts, please.

So we get the car moved, it's driveable enough to move across the street to one of her friend's drives. They are gracious enough to let it sit there for a couple days til the insurance company comes out. (Not much good it will do with liability.) I'm generally pissy 'coz Christmas was already going to be thin enough as it was. One of the guys standing around said "Christmas is going to suck for you this year." Ya think? Yea buddy, thanks, Merry F*&#^@ Christmas to you, too, ya putz. So I look at him and say "Christmas was already going to suck this year, this is just icing on the cake." and turned around and walked off. My daughter is mad at me because I'm worried about all the "big people" stuff -- she's going to the hospital to make sure her "BEST FRIEND" is alright. Yea, great honey, I'll start sellin' off everything we own because we're gonna lose it all. And all that stuff you wanted for Christmas that you weren't going to get anyway because I need to do things like pay the rent and electric and put gas in my car to get to work so I can barely exist anyway, yea, you're going to get even less than nothing this year. We weren't having Christmas. We had the tree up, and that's about it. I was in no position to buy the kids anything. This did not help.

Fortunately, Jen was treated and released with bruises. The other kid, however either has a broken vertabrae or a torn ligament/tendon in his neck. They couldn't see clearly, and he is now in Ft Wayne while they sort it all out.

My daughter and I sat down last night and had a long talk about insurance, liability coverage and what it means, insurance policies and how they can drop us for doing stupid sh** like this and how if she doesn't have insurance, she doesn't drive. And if my policies go up, I have to make the choice between what I want more. A vehicle to get back and forth to work or a roof over our heads. Hey, guess what, one without the other and it won't matter for more than a month. 20 years and I've not had to turn in anything to my insurance company for myself. When I was about her age, I was stupid enough to let her father drive my car and he wrecked it. (Apple doesn't fall far from the tree, I guess.)

So she's paying people to take her places like she did before she got her license. And you can bet it will be awhile before she drives my car again. And once again, the holidays bring on the overwhelming urge to walk out in front of a train, or slit my wrists with rusty razors. I've tried, but people just won't stab me in the neck with a pencil either. I even offered to sharpen it for them. They just smile and back away slowly.

Merry Christmas everyone, hope yours is at least tolerable.